Flirting 101

[KattyKatie]

OK so everyone is confused by flirting. How do you do it, exactly? How do you know you're going overboard? That type of stuff. Here, post all your best "tricks of the trade" and share with the world your awesome man-catching skills  
Well the best advice I can give is:
*Always make eye contact
*Don't be afraid to be outrageous (you gotta catch his eye SOMEHOW
*Don't even TRY that old trick of flirting with his friends, most guys will just move on.

[x n0ise]

Well....I don't know, I guess flirting just comes naturally to me!   ;D  I usually:

*Make really good eye contact(look DEEP into his eyes!)   ;D
*Touch his arm when you're talking, or something of the sort.
*Smile as much as possible.

That's all I can think of right now.  If I notice anything else that I do, I'll let ya know!  

[horsesalltheway]

Oh! Flirting with Chris! My favorite Well this is what I do...

If people say 'Chris is trying to look strong' I'm like 'O, but Chris IS looking strong'
I just kinda tag along with him too. He doesn't mind. We're tight. Can't wait till the winter games... me in his arms at the dance... oooo....

Nikki

[Queen_of_Hollywood]

i wouldn't know how to flirt if it came up & smacked me upside the head!

[x.just.a.little.grL.x]

DO:
*ask a lot of questions
*smile and act as if you're having a good time
*laugh at his jokes even if they're not funny
*playfully punch him or something of that sort
*keep him interested in what you have to say

DON'T:
*hang all over him (it looks pathetic and obvious)
*overdo it with the compliments
*talk about other guys or crushes in his presence (it just shows you're not interested and gives him mixed sigs)
*talk all about you

[whereISmyhalo]

Man like to feel needed. Thats doesn't mean you have to go all pathetic, but if you like a guy, don;t put him down and be really sarky toward him.

Don't play games, or get your friends involved, guys get bored and confused with giggling groups of girls.

Men like women who can live without them! Have interests and ideas about things other than guys, and don't smother guys you like.

[Soleluna]

All the things you girls said are good, but I see it this way: JUST BE WHO YOU ARE! don't try to make eye contact and touch him if it is not your style, or if you don't feel like it.

I see flirting in a negative way, sort of, Many girls put on a mask when they are flirting, not showing who they really are. I want a guy to like me for who I am, not because I touched his biceps one time more than the other girls.

[Queen_of_Hollywood]

^^agreed.

[x n0ise]

That is true...but I guess the way I flirt IS natural for me...and it IS me!   ;D

[vbkimber07]

When I flirt I mostly just joke around with the guy.  I usually don't give a lot of fake-sounding compliments--I would rather make the guy fish for them!  I don't go up to a guy and decide I'm going to flirt, I just kinda do it.  Most flirting is having confidence.  I think the best thing about flirting is that there are no rules and no "right way".  I used to think I didn't know how, but now I realize I had my own special style waiting to come out.  People have their own ways of percieving flirting.  Now, I am not condoning changing yourself for a guy, but if you just can't seem to get through to them, watch other girls who are fairly sucessful flirting with him and see what they do.  This probably isn't a very good long term solution though, if you and the guy were meant to be together, you would have similar flirting styles.  
Finally, an ability to truly flirt as yourself comes as you get older and more experienced.  Two years ago I'm not sure I knew what flirting was, but now I consider myself fairly good at it.  (This is on a day of confidence, tomorrow it will probably completely change)

[vbkimber07]

Well, I was the last person to post here, but it's been a while.  I thought I'd add.

I've found it is a lot easier to flirt with a guy when I  know he is taken or when I doubt he is interested than when I think I have a chance.  Does anyone else have this happen?

[GabiGirl23]

^^^I'm not sure I know what you're talking about there, but I'll give it a shot. I've never really had that happen to me, because I don't flirt a whole lot, and when I do, it's usually with the guys I like or I think like me. But maybe it's easier for you to flirt with guys you don't think are interested or who are taken because you either get too nervous around the guys you like, or think like you...or maybe you have a fear of too much success? I really hope I'm not coming off as rude or anything, I'm not trying to be, I'm just thinking of reasons why that could happen. Of course I don't have a whole lot of experience in this area so you know...

Well, as I said above, I don't do a whole lot of flirting. It kind of depends on my mood, but I do sometimes. When I flirt I tend to just do the whole friend thing..I just treat the guy like a close friend, just a little different. I'll smile more, maybe touch him on the shoulder, and laugh a little more. That's about as far as I'll go with flirting, I'd rather be myself and have him like me for that..plus girls that giggle constantly and squeal and act all ditzy, or that act kinda slutty, that just bugs me. Of course, none of the girls who have posted here seem to flirt like that, which is good.    

[tam]

^^^vbkimber07!
Yeah, that happens with me!!  I tense up when someone I like or likes me gets too close... I get very nervous...

I don't think any of you are gonna like the way I flirt but I thought you'd like to know.  
My best friend and I LOVE to flirt, it's just our 'thing'!

We act like we are fighting over a guy.  We get like, "uhum, get a life, I saw him first!" -always as a joke, with our friends, that we don't have crushes on.  We'd say, "come sit next to me!"... blah blah. We compliment them and stuff.. I've never paid much attention to eye-contact though.    

They KNOW we are joking though, so we always do it...
But now we have a new set of friends and we can't do that anymore because they take us seriously!  They come sit next to us, they ask us out and stuff, and when we tell them we were only joking they get bummed... So we have decided only to flirt with the guys who we know wont take us seriously.

But no, we don't giggle.  We only laugh afterwards at their reactions!

[hockeygurl72]

hey i was reading an article on flirting, it says why we do it first, then what we do when we flirt, then how to flirt better. Here it is, I'm just gonna copy and paste it. I hope it helps!

(I'm gonna post the sections seperately, so its not to much at once)

Also, here's who the article is by: "Romance 101 Guides
Flirting 101 by Hara Marano" just so they get credit and all, and it was on eHarlequin.com, it was something that came up on aol when I went into aim.

[hockeygurl72]

Part 1: Scientifically, flirting is serious business, but it's also just plain fun. Learn how to read the signals that come your way, and how to get good at sending a few of your own!

Why We Flirt

Birds do it. Bees do it. In their way, even educated fleas do it. They flirt. Think of flirting as a silent but very visual language that creatures great and small use to indicate their interest in a particular member of the opposite sex. We flirt to announce attraction and to signal availability. It is a universal language spoken by all animals as well as humans, a kind of self-promotion advertising our fitness for a relationship and, sooner or later, for mating.

Scientists now know that we flirt by trying out our sexual sundries without having to go all the way with every potential prospect — it's pretty much risk-free. What's more, flirtation kicks in automatically, at the instant of attraction, driven by primitive, emotionally reactive parts of the brain.

While flirting can be viewed as important business with serious goals in mind, it's also just plain fun. Men and women do it regardless of where it may lead because it's pleasurable and erotic in its own right.

How We Flirt

There are good reasons why our physical features play the greatest role in flirtation and our brains are tuned to respond to them. Just as peacocks are primed to pay attention to elaborate tail feathers, women may quiver at the sight of men with large, even features, square jaws, and big bones. They may actually rate such men as better prospective sex partners. One theory is that all of those large features are also signs that the creature has an immune system healthy enough to support such extravagant apparatus.

Similarly, by flaunting, say, our curves and swinging our hips from side to side as we sashay down the street, we do more than announce "I am an attractive and available woman." We call attention to important attributes. Scientists have established that a small waist coupled with ample hips — very curvy proportions — is a sign of both health and fertility in women. It's nature's way of declaring the likelihood that we are capable of bearing children and surviving to raise them. After all, nature has a big stake in the attraction matter — nothing less than the continuation of the species.

When a relationship gets under way, courtship follows, and two people can then apply more rational criteria in deciding whether a particular partner is lifetime-mate material. Also, more subtle signals come into play, like humor, intelligence, creativity, emotional sensitivity, and expressiveness. After all, they, too, figure prominently in our ability to survive the relatively complex lives we lead today.