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Post by Soleluna on Apr 3, 2002 10:42:50 GMT -5
I am not sure if I really like this guy. I mean, I think so, but what if I get in a relationship and realize I don't? I don't wanna hurt him. I was emotionally hurt with my last boyfriend. Maybe it's bcause of that. Anyone can relate?
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Post by Toxic-Avenger on Apr 3, 2002 12:12:51 GMT -5
I can relate a little. Relationships are hard, human interaction is a puzzle. If you like this guy then go for it, and tell him how you feel.
<<what if I get in a relationship and realize I don't? I don't wanna hurt him. >>
That's a risk you will have to take. What if he turns out to be this fantastic-guy-of-your-dreams? I appreciate your concern for his feelings but if you hurt him, he'll get over it and will not be scarred for life.
<<I was emotionally hurt with my last boyfriend. >>
Okay, that's fair, but again, you sort of have to move on too. Get to know him. One way would be to go out to a resturant together. Observe how he treats the waitstaff, eventually that's how he'll treat you.
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Post by Cassiopeia on Apr 4, 2002 20:31:15 GMT -5
If you have to question it, then you probably aren't ready for another relationship. I'm not sure how long ago your break-up was, but it seems like it really hurt you. However, you must realize that most romantic relationships end at some time. You're going to break up with more people than you marry. In each relationship, someone might get hurt. Most people go through several relationships before they find someone that's right for them. I think you know this though. You sound like you are just vulnerable. If I were you, I'd try to get to know this guy better and become friends with him first.
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Post by Soleluna on Apr 6, 2002 10:59:58 GMT -5
Well, the situation is this: I broke up with my boyfriend 6 months ago. But that is not the point. The point is, maybe I am not ready for a relationship yet. I got pangs of fear when this boy I think I like (and yet I am not sure) asked me out on a date. I was sick so I couldn't go anyway.
The pangs of fear in the pit of my stomach are not the same ones I got when I started the relationship with my ex (he was my first bf and we stayed toghether 8 months) - those were more like butterflies in my stomach.
These are like the ones I got at the end of the relationship, when he was getting very oppressive and called me 5 times a day, every day. I didn't want to go out with him so often, I felt that I was losing my liberty but I was also afraid of losing him, so when he asked me to go out I got this feeling.
With this new boy in my life, I really would like to give it a try, but I am scared. Afraid he is not good enough, afraid I am not good enough.
I long for a relationship with all my heart, but I dunno if he is the right one for me. He seems funny and nice, but maybe a bit immature. I have known him for a long time, but only superficially. We have gotten to know each other better about a month ago.
I am afraid to lose a person that could give me much if I don't give it a try... yet afraid of finding out he is not the right one.
He is not very beautiful, and maybe I am not very mature saying this, but I am also afraid of the opinion of my friends.
I dunno y, but I want perfection from ME and from others. I EXPECT perfection. But no one is perfect
Hope all this made sense.
Please help me out.
Luv
Federica
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Post by LisaRocksYourWorld, yo on Apr 6, 2002 22:23:02 GMT -5
It sounds like you're afraid a new boyfriend will be possessive like your old boyfriend. Chances are, he won't be.
Only you know if he is a good person. And I know you're good enough for him. If anything, you're TOO good for him.
I say, take the chance with the relationship. It might take some getting used to. Don't let him take advantage of you. If you feel uncomfortable, you can always end it.
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Post by whereISmyhalo on Apr 10, 2002 10:26:27 GMT -5
Soleluna, there is nothing wrong with going on a few dates and getting to know this guy. Plenty of people of both genders go on a few dates before the word relationship springs to mind. I know your last relationship was heavy but dating is not about relationships, its about tyring people out.
That's not an excuse to hurt people, or be careless. But whats the harm in seeing this guy a few times? How do you know he would feel led on? Any person you care for is taking a risk, but love is much greater than fear. Now go enjoy yourself!!
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